Where Conspiracy and Reality Collide

Dear friends,   I got a video of some fat Texan doing a song called, We’re Living in an Obama-nation.  My response follows.  

AC

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Dear D, (name redacted to protect the innocent)

Thanks for the vid.  I get stuff like this all the time from another buddy of mine.  I don’t mind at all, but sometimes I have to fire back.  Let me just point out:

This song is an Obamination.  Just a bunch of cliches strung together, with a totally predictable melody, pandering to people who live on fear, hate and Rush Limbaugh’s bullshit.  Why are these people always whining about how persecuted they are.  This guy obviously hasn’t missed any meals.  As for balls, it doesn’t take balls to tell people what they want to hear.

What I really hate is that these people always tie all the issues together like everyone thinks in lockstep?  Let’s see:

1. Guns
2. Abortion
3. Flagwaving
4. Support the troops
5. Illegal immigrants
6. Loves his family (who doesn’t?  Well, there’s the Palins, but who’s counting?)

How could he miss gay marriage, creationism, birthers, Jesus, Osama Bin Laden, global warming?  The “liberal” media (who somehow forgot to mention there were NO WMDs and were shameless lapdogs of the Bush administration).  Oh yeah, and taking Christ out of Christmas?  What about drugs in baseball and Tiger Woods?  I’m surprised and disappointed he didn’t put Anna Nicole Smith in there.  And Michael Jackson.  Jesus, there’s no end once you start.

I mean, take that kitchen sink out of the trailer and put it in the song.  The fact is that we don’t all think alike.  I, for example, live in a house trailer, drink wildly excessive amounts of beer and Jim Beam, believe pot should be legalized, like guns, the death penalty, pro-choice, hate the wars-love the troops, blame the US government (both parties) for allowing the immigrant thing to git out of control, will never forgive Bush/Cheney for starting a pointless war and not catching Osama, think Reid, Pelosi and about half the Democrats in congress are corrupt and stupid, think almost all Republicans are not “conservative” at all, would have voted for John McCain in 2000 (if Carl Rove hadn’t fucked him in S. Carolina with the black love child rumor), would have voted for Ron Paul in 2004 or 2008 (if the media hadn’t trivialized him),  respect the flag-but don’t think it’s some sacred relic, am apparently the only person in America who realizes that John Wayne was just a mediocre actor-not an actual hero, am disappointed that Obama hasn’t totally fucked the Republicans-like they did the Clintons, hate golf and all sports, eat meat twice a day, and am getting fed up with these so-called Christians.  That’s just me.  Y’see like many Americans, I’m an independent thinker.

I believe in pragmatism.  What works?  Not what do I feel?  The same people who wouldn’t be caught dead watching Steel Magnolias (which I love, by the way) are the ones who are always talking about the way they feel.  “I’m scared.”  Bullshit! They’re not scared-they’re just pissed that they lost the election and are throwing a tantrum over it!

The same people who worry about unborn children have no problem with killing hundreds of thousands of adults and children with bombs.  Rank hypocricy!

George W. Bush started two wars, which he mis-handled so badly that they may never be over, ran up the biggest debt in history, wrecked the economy by letting his rich cronies on Wall St. and in Houston run the country, and started the bailout,.  Let this dick-head sing about that!  What I’m sayin’ is, life ain’t simple, and I hate simplistic messages.

Now here’s simplistic.  Obama should bring all the troops home, go for total public option (put the health insurance companies out of business), push for investigation of the Bush administration on war crimes charges, demand re-payment of all bailout funds, close about half the offices in Washington, cut the military budget in half and tell Congress to eat a bowl of fuck!  But that’s just me.

I think Obama’s the smartest prez we’ve had since FDR.  Whether he wins or his policies work is still up for grabs, but I think we all agree that America needs a change.  He can’t possibly do a worse job than the last administration.  If George Bush had had half the brains Ike had, we’d be living high on the hog right now.  And even Ike had a mistress!  From Washington on this country has been run by incompetents, cheap hustlers, drunks, adulterers, crackpots, thieves and fools.  It’s a miracle we haven’t been invaded by the Philipinos!

On the positive side, I love the location of the video at Cadillac Ranch (near Amarillo) .Don’t let this discourage you from sending anything.  I love it all.  And I support Kinky Freidman for governor of Texas. I’ve loved him since he sang The Ballad of Charles Whitman and My Feet Stink, and I don’t Love Jesus. 

 I’m no man of principle. I played for a Swarzenegger fundraiser for money.   We’re all whores!

Regards,

Angry Cowboy

~ by angrycowboy on December 14, 2009.

Posted in Current Events, Economics, Politics, RANTS
Tags: Angry Cowboy